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7 Craziest Beauty Treatments for Your Vagina

From pubic hair softeners to vajacials, check out these vaginal treatments and products that make Brazilians seem tame
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If you ask us, vaginas and all their accoutrements are pretty amazing; they're designed to be self-cleaning and naturally expand to accommodate everything from a well-endowed lover (what a team player!) to a baby's 13-and-a-half-inch head. NBD. Meanwhile, the clitoris has more nerve endings than any other body part (hello, multiple orgasms!).

But that doesn't mean that humans haven't found numerous ways to alter and tweak the natural state of downstairs affairs. Sure, you've probably heard of Brazilians and vajazzling, but if you think blinging out your bits or having all of your pubic hair yanked out with hot wax is outrageous, wait until you hear about these other bizarre treatments and products that target your vadge.

Some are a bit more practical than others, helping gals deal with, say, pesky ingrown hairs, but others straight up cause our pelvic muscles to clench in revulsion (checking Kegels off our to-do list). But enough beating around the, ahem, bush: Here, we bring you the seven weirdest beauty treatments for vaginas.

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Read My Lips
As if trying to keep up with the demands of having rosy pink lips and cheeks weren't annoying enough, now there's pressure to have our other lips emanate a natural glow. Meet My New Pink Button, the genital dye that promises to return that "youthful" shade to your nether regions, because apparently if your vulva isn't pink, it's washed up (never mind the fact that this body part comes in many different colors to begin with).

Best For: Those with clueless partners who have no idea how to locate a woman's "pink button" -- because there's nothing like dyeing your clit pink to scream "PRESS HERE!"

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Let Your Hair Down
Hairless vadges have been trending ever since Brazilians burst on the scene like the saucy South American friend we always wanted in our squad. But for those who prefer to keep things au naturel while still showing their hair down there a little loving maintenance, the appropriately named company Fur makes oil and stubble cream that promises to soften your pubic hair. Talk about working out the kinks (sorry, we had to). For ladies who are fans of waxing or shaving, the brand also claims its pubic potions help prevent ingrown hairs.

Best For: Those who want to say buh-bye to post waxing bumps -- or those who dream of a bush as touchably soft as a newborn baby alpaca's fur (and the accompanying gratuitous petting that said downy bush might encourage from that special someone).

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To Dye For
There's dye that's specially formulated for gray hair, so it makes sense that there would also be pube-specific hair dye (we're using the phrase "makes sense" loosely here). Yep, depending on your preference, you can opt for more traditional colors -- think blonde or brown -- or the unexpected pop of pink, blue or other primary shade (perhaps for the music festival-bound bush?).

Best For: Gals interested in having the carpet match the dyed drapes, as well as those who want to cover up grays or shake things up with a rainbow-hued bush.

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Full Steam Ahead
There's nothing like a nice steam room session to blow off some, well, steam after a long, hard day (they don't call it an executive workout for nothin', after all). And now there's a vagina-specific steam bath that supposedly helps your hoo-ha deal with some of its most common stressors, like cramps and irregular menstrual cycles.

Skeptical? Perhaps the fact that Gywneth Paltrow sang the treatment's praises might change your mind. "You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al," she wrote last year on her lifestyle site Goop. "It is an energetic release -- not just a steam douche -- that balances female hormone levels."

According to the Tikkun Holistic Spa -- the very spa where Gwynnie got her V-Steam -- additional benefits range from protecting the "uterus from ulcers and tumors" to helping "fight infections." But it's up to you to decide if proponents of this treatment -- including the Goop goddess herself -- are onto something or full of hot air (you know, figuratively -- because of course they're full of hot air post-vaginal steaming).

Best For: Western medicine cynics and those who, like Gwyneth, love talking about the fancy, obscure treatments they've experienced -- often without any regard to their audience's discomfort levels.

BY ROSE CURIEL | FEB 11, 2016 | SHARES
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