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7 Craziest Beauty Treatments for Your Vagina

From pubic hair softeners to vajacials, check out these vaginal treatments and products that make Brazilians seem tame
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To Dye For
There's dye that's specially formulated for gray hair, so it makes sense that there would also be pube-specific hair dye (we're using the phrase "makes sense" loosely here). Yep, depending on your preference, you can opt for more traditional colors -- think blonde or brown -- or the unexpected pop of pink, blue or other primary shade (perhaps for the music festival-bound bush?).

Best For: Gals interested in having the carpet match the dyed drapes, as well as those who want to cover up grays or shake things up with a rainbow-hued bush.

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Full Steam Ahead
There's nothing like a nice steam room session to blow off some, well, steam after a long, hard day (they don't call it an executive workout for nothin', after all). And now there's a vagina-specific steam bath that supposedly helps your hoo-ha deal with some of its most common stressors, like cramps and irregular menstrual cycles.

Skeptical? Perhaps the fact that Gywneth Paltrow sang the treatment's praises might change your mind. "You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al," she wrote last year on her lifestyle site Goop. "It is an energetic release -- not just a steam douche -- that balances female hormone levels."

According to the Tikkun Holistic Spa -- the very spa where Gwynnie got her V-Steam -- additional benefits range from protecting the "uterus from ulcers and tumors" to helping "fight infections." But it's up to you to decide if proponents of this treatment -- including the Goop goddess herself -- are onto something or full of hot air (you know, figuratively -- because of course they're full of hot air post-vaginal steaming).

Best For: Western medicine cynics and those who, like Gwyneth, love talking about the fancy, obscure treatments they've experienced -- often without any regard to their audience's discomfort levels.

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Wiggin' Out
Gather round, children, and let me tell ye of a time when women wanted more -- not less -- pubic hair. Yes, believe it or not, bizarre vaginal beauty products are not a modern-day phenomenon; back in the day, certain women reached for a merkin or pubic hair wig. Why? When old timey medicine left them no other option than to shave their pubic hair to swiftly deal with a case of crabs, some reached for pubic hairpieces to cover up their bald bits (female modesty was a pretty big thing back in the day, after all). Prostitutes would also use merkins to obscure signs of venereal diseases. So much for the simpler times of yesteryear. And merkins are still around; You may have spotted one on the big screen, where actors who bare it all often sport 'em for love scenes.

Best For: Bikini wax disaster sufferers.

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Skin Deep
Does your vulva have a special event coming up? Maybe a red carpet event or perhaps it's finally "meeting" that special someone for the first time? If, for whatever reason, having genitals that glow with otherworldly radiance is a priority, then you might want to look into booking a vajacial. Like a traditional facial, this treatment cleans, exfoliates and moisturizes your skin -- all while dealing with bikini area ingrown hairs and acne (yes, acne). In fact, the folks at Stript Wax Bar tell us a vajacial is less driven by vanity than health reasons. Have you ever seen an ingrown that's been picked or left to fester? Let's just say that the resulting bacterial infection sometimes requires a medical professional to "drain" the abscess.

Best For: Those who suffer from painful razor burn or ingrown hairs, as well as habitual "pickers" who are more likely to infect the area.

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Guard Duty
(Camel) toeing the line between functional and funny are camel toe guards, for the gal who is bold enough to wear superform-fitting attire but not so bold that she wants said attire to hug -- and show off --her labia. These adhesive guards claim to obscure camel toe, similar to how nipple shields hide pert nips when a woman decides to go braless.

Best For: Habitual wearers of too-tight yoga pants, bikini bottoms or other articles of clothing that cause those unsightly frontal wedgies.

BY ROSE CURIEL | FEB 11, 2016 | SHARES
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